Ferne Arfin 19 July 2017
Everyone is Beautiful at the Chiltern Firehouse
How I stumbled into a chi-chi restaurant too exclusive to even have a sign. Was the food good? I think that was beside the point.
I had enjoyed a small personal victory and wanted to treat myself to a very nice lunch. The Marylebone area of London – particularly between Marylebone High Street and Baker Street – is full of interesting little places where one can settle in for a very nice lunch.
But somehow as I walked through the side streets towards Baker Street Tube, my ultimate destination, nothing really struck my fancy.
Then I arrived at what appeared to be a garden terrace. An attendent manned the entrance. He was wearing a suit and tie and he was beautiful. There was no sign as far as I could see.
“Is this a restaurant?” I asked him.
“Yes.”
“What kind of food do you serve?”
“Portuguese.”
“Where is the entrance?” I still didn’t see any sign, any obvious way in or any menu posted discretely on an outside wall,as required by law in London
“Right this way,” he said, and ushered me into the garden. I still didn’t know where I was.
Eventually, a hostess offered to find me a seat inside (the garden was nearly full except for the bits of it that would soon be rained on). She was tall, slim and dressed in a fabulous two piece number in a dark leafy green. She was beautiful.
“Right this way,” he said, and ushered me into the garden. I still didn’t know where I was.
Inside, the restaurant was packed and buzzing. Another hostess, in a similarly designerish outfit, all in blue (also beautiful) offered me a seat at the bar. I hate sitting on bar stools but eventually she found me a seat at a sort of banquette with high single tables, facing the bar. The bartender and wine steward were beautifully dressed and beautiful (as you can see in the picture above).
It was only when someone finally handed me a menu, that I realized I had randomly stumbled into the Chiltern Firehouse, once one of London’s hottest celebrity haunts. The restaurant, with its kitchen “curated” by Michelin-starred chef Nuno Mendes, has cooled down some since the virtual hysteria of its opening months in 2014. But, people still wait weeks to book this place, and there I was settling in, by accident, after a Wednesday afternoon stroll.
All around me, beautiful people were tucking into gorgeous looking food. Nips, tucks and tans as far as the eye could see. And when my food finally arrived, it was absolutely beautiful to look at too.
Did I mention that everyone – and everything – is beautiful at the Chiltern Firehouse.
I ate a salad of heritage tomatoes with strawberries, a slice of sourdough bread, an omelet of crabmeat and lobster (pictured here) that was the strangest looking omelet with the oddest texture that I’ve ever eaten. It was delicious and I am very curious to know how it was made but I hope I’m not offending the chef when I say it did not satisfy my desire for a nice, tender, eggy omelet. It was something else entirely.
The strangest omelet I’ve ever eaten – but beautiful.
Oh, and I did treat myself to a glass of Ruinart NV champagne – well I did say I was celebrating.
And with a black coffee to finish, and the 15% tip, the price of my special lunch of omelet, salad and champagne came to an eye-watering £79.93.
Was it worth it? Well, it was a very nice lunch but I think if you have to ask about value for money, this probably isn’t your kind of place. I’m not actually sure when it will next be mine.
The Nitty Gritty
The restaurant and attached boutique hotel are owned by André Balasz who also owns the legendary Chateau Marmont in Hollywood, The Mercer in New York’s Soho, the Sunset Beach on Shelter Island and Standard hotels around America.
- The Chiltern Firehouse
- 1 Chiltern Street, Marylebone, London W1U 7PA
- Telephone +44 020 7073 7676
- Open every day for breakfast, lunch and dinner and Saturday and Sunday for brunch. Check the restaurant website for opening times which vary from day to day.
Goodness me that’s a lot. Sounds very intriguing but out of my price range, I’m afraid.
Out of my budget too and probably not worth it unless you are a real poser.